Peter Pan Syndrome.

Its known by doctors all over the world.. "people who cant / wont grow up"...

i havent been told i have this but while speaking with my parents today i had a sudden LIFE LESSON punch to the face. I'm nearly 20 and i cant stop dying my hair stupid colors and being a baby about practically everything. Deep inside i want to be my natural hair colored self... but i also want to express myself for the person i am.. im addicted to art and being different is what i long to be.. but it seems like im doing it for the wrong reasons. i dont know. i dont know what i want to do i guess... but personally i enjoy being different, seeing peoples faces light up when they see my hair.. the look on their faces when they see the vibrant blue or pink or purple.. but when i look at myself in the mirror.. and think long and hard about it.. i dont know what im doing with my life.. it seems like... im trapped in a body i dont want to be in.. i dont feel pretty.. i hold my head down walking past people because i think they will laugh at me or call me a freak. i shouldnt care as much as i do.. but i cant seem to help it.. i want to be like the people in the magazines.. gorgeous long hair.. amazing smile etc.. but im not.. im a miserable teen from wyke in bradford.. unhappy with everything. ey well. till next time guys.



Peace.xo

P.